なんちゃって

Actually, around two weeks ago I was in Osaka for a concert. This was just after me getting off of a flight from America not only 12 hours earlier. At the venue, on the last day (I was in Osaka all weekend and attended two out of the five concerts that weekend… Because I am disgusting fantrash and I have nothing else better to do), I lost my wallet. Or, well, it was “stolen”.

See, in Japan, stolen things isn’t a norm. Before someone steals your wallet, they’ll steal your bike. Yeah, I know, right? Priorities and all of that. Why steal the bike when you can steal the wallet and buy like five bikes from the six hundred dollars inside, right? Naw, that’s too risky. So, the happenings of a wallet going up missing is pretty much next to impossible. Well, I won’t say impossible, I’ll just say the odds are very low (except if you’re in the Shinsekai area, then the odds just shoot up).

Usually, if somone leaves a wallet hanging around… It pretty much stays there, or someone turns it into the staff at the venue. But, in my case, none of that happened. My wallet was gone. What was supposed to be an awesome happy day to be spent sobbing over a bunch of Japanese men in their 30s singing off key and dancing like they’re going backwards in life, was mostly freaking the fuck out that a wallet with everything I need to survive in Japan was gone.

Like any responsible adult would do, I immediately called all my credit card companies in both America and Japan to cancel the cards. America was a piece of cake (OR PIE HAHAHAH no) while Japan was, again, annoying as usual. You see, America just replaces your shit with no questions asked for free whereas Japan will question you like you’re the police, investigate the situation, then tell you that we’ll send out some new cards after you pay us a processing fee of 15 dollars. Or you can leave the accounts open and just wait for the cards to come back.

What.

Anyway, I filed a report with the police in Osaka… or the nearest koban I could find near Osaka Dome. Speaking of which, does anyone clean these police offices in Osaka? I swear, I thought I stepped into a New York City subway station. Actually, the subway station near Dyckman were cleaner than that koban I was at. Also, what’s heat? That seems to be a foreign concept in government buildings, I’m starting to notice.

After filing the report, I was giving a piece of paper with some chicken scratch scribbled on it and a phone number. Told to call back in a few days and why the hell would someone from north Japan be driving all the way to Osaka (え〜あの関ジャニ∞って人気やわぁ). About a week later I get a call from the credit card company in Japan that they got a report from the police in Hyogo Prefecture that they have my wallet.

What.

Anyway, a few days later I get a postcard in the mail from the Hyogo Prefectural Police telling me I need to take my ass back to Hyogo (Amagasaki, to be exact) and claim my shit. I called up to see if they could just mail it to me considering I’m 3 goddamn hours away. But, because of atypical Japanese bureacracy, I had to go.

….

Did you know that you’re supposed to bring between 5% to 20% of the total estimated value of the discovered good as a thank you to the person that turned your shit in? Imagine if it was a LV bag… Holy shit. Luckily, because I’m broke, it wasn’t. looool

I get to the police station, fill out some paperwork, collect my shit and go back home.

Surprisingly enough, my wallet was completely intact. Cash, cards, everything.

さすが日本~

If it was America, I would never see the light of day of that wallet. What I would see though is a bunch of illegal charges and financial headaches.

The bro that saved my life, though honestly he could have just turned the shit into the lost and found at the arena, didnt want to be paid or anything and actually wanted to remain anonymous but they gave me his contact details anyway. So Imma call him up this weekend to thank him.

Ah well.

Now to deal with my BoE who thinks I killed someone in Osaka, hid their body in Hyogo, and throw their stolen goods in my storage house in Kobe.

The first part of my trip was simply driving down the new Noto Satoyamakaidou from Kahoku to Uchinada. Nothing exciting there. But my second leg covered the entire south side of the Noto.

Now, I underestimated the size of the Noto.

First mistake, never underestimate the size of the Noto.

To get through Kaga/Kanazawa, takes about an hour on the 8 or 30 minutes on the Hokuriku Jidoushadou. This is starting from my town and driving straight into Oyabe, Toyama. The Noto is a whole other beast all in itself. So when I started on the Noto at around 4pm, I thought I’d make it completely around before dark.

Second mistake, don’t travel the Noto at night.

When I reached Shika, it was already 6pm and the sun was setting. It was a gorgeous sunset caught off the cliffside. Against my better judgement, I decided to keep on driving without realizing that

a) The farther north you go, the lesser the people

and

b) There are absolutely no street lights

When I reached the Wajima City line, it was dusk and night was creeping on fast.

Wajima is a huge … city. More like county. But whatever, it’s huge. By the time I hit Wajima City proper, it was 8pm.

I had thought that I could complete my journey. Without really checking my map, I thought that the North side of the Noto was a shorter trip than the South Side. So, I continued through Wajima in hopes that I’ll be back in the Nanao area by 8:30 ~ 9.

lol 

Third Mistake, absolutely do not travel the North Coast at night.

Once you leave Wajima, it’s you, the cliffside, and the Japan Sea. There is absolutely nothing else out there. Not even street lights. It’s pitch black on your right side and it’s completely pitch black on your left side. The road is extremely narrow and you can only hope that you don’t make a mistake and have your car topping off into the black Japan Sea.

Fucking scared as shit, I checked my GPS and realized I was not even close to even reaching Suzu and decided to turn back once I reached a tourist road stop that was, surprisingly, lit. I hauled ass, made it to Wajima in about 15 minutes, jumped on the Satoyamakaidou and halled ass home. I didn’t make it to my apartment until 12am. I had nightmares that night.

Never travel the Noto at night.

I still wanted to completely my quest though.

The third and last leg of my Noto Adventure took into account all the mistakes I made on the last one and just didn’t make them again.

Leaving my apartment at around 11am, getting the car filled up and ready to go, I didn’t hit the Noto till around 12pm. I realized that instead of repeating the same trip, I would start on the opposite side. So, starting from Nanao, I worked my way up the North side of the coast.

Kokudou 249 is the road that wraps around the entire peninsula as a by pass through the cities. Sometimes it rides the coast while other times it cuts past the coast line. I had to basically pay attention to street signs to keep following the coastline instead of being diverted through the bypasses that cut through the mountains.

The North Side, around Noto Island, has amazingly blue calm waters. Unlike the South Side and Kaga/Kanazawa, the coastline here is well maintained and not filled with garbage. There’s also a very lazy, laid back, feel to the communities along this coastline. All fishing communities completely dependent on fishing and farming.

When you reach Anamizu Town, hugging the coastline, you have to get off the 249 and get in Kendou 34 to continue the trip.

Kendou 34, or Prefecture Route 34, is not really a route at all. It’s more like an abandoned one way road that hugs the coastline and squeezes itself through fishing communities and ghost towns. Vegetation is overgrown and you have to drive extremely slow to running your car into some old person’s vegetable patch.

There are some locals riding bikes and the occasional yellow plate truck but for the most part, its pretty empty save for you and the coastline. There are no trains in this area of the Noto, so the residents that live here are almost completely cut off from the city. There are bus tops but service is pretty much every hour or two. The communities survive upon each other doing their part. I wouldn’t doubt it that the communities are now just made up of one extended family considering how small they now are.

Once leaving Anamizu, it was around 3pm. I had finally reached Suzu, which is the farthest main city on the Noto. Taking a pitstop to just refresh, I realized that I still had another 2 hours to go according to Google Maps to Wajima. Not wanting to repeat the last time, I decided to basically speed through the rest of the coastline to make it to Wajima before 5pm.

The Deep Noto Scenic Coastline Road, or Oku-Noto Zekkei Kaidou, stretches past Suzu City and hugs the entire coastline, dropping you off in Wajima City. Instead of taking the 249 by pass, I jumped on Kendou 12 which eventually merged into Kendou 28.

Driving through this part of the Noto gave me a nerdy nostalgic feeling. If you ever played Final Fantasy VIII, the first town you visit is a fishing town that looks and feels exactly like the fishing towns of the Noto. I could just hear the song in my head as I drove through these small tiny towns.

Coming up and around the farthest tip of the Noto, you climb up a cliff which separates you from the coastline. There’s an old light house and inn on the cliff, but due to me trying to make time, I did not attempt to stop.

I arrived at the top of the cliff to a really scenic panorama view of the tip of the Noto. There’s a parking spot and a marker that notes you’re driving on the scenic route and a placard of information about when to catch the best sunsets (between mid July and mid August). Of course, you better be planning a stay at one of the local ins or camping out on the coast because driving this road would be absolutely dangerous at night.

Continuing on, it’s was just me and the coastline as I made my way towards Wajima. There’s some interesting rock formations along the coast, as if the planet earth decided to vomit rock all over the place.

Eventually Kendou 28 reunites with Kokudou 249 and for the remainder of the trip, I drove that to Wajima. Along Kokudou 249 are several salt farms. This area is known for it’s salt and these farms have been in business for hundreds of years. I contemplated stopping to buy some salt but I had no actual okane and obviously a 400 year old salt farm separated from society was not gonna take a Visa.

I made it to Wajima by 5:30 thus completing my Noto tour.

The Noto has a completely different feeling than the rest of Ishikawa. It’s a land trapped in time and maintaining old traditions. Driving through some towns makes it feel like time stopped in 1960 while some areas seem like it never left the Taisho period. While the youth have moved away, the elderly still remain. Old people on electric wheel chairs and walkers still tend to their fields or fish. Old fisherman sit on the pier and drink beer while talking about the good ol’ days. It’s a calming serenity that is like an escape from society.

But it’s also a dying society. Eventually the Noto will just be what the people over here in mainland Ishikawa call it, a dangerous place with nothing to do or see. Everyone will have moved away and the old will die, taking with them their 400 year old traditions. What was once a plance to banish criminals and fallen clans (The Taira family was banished here nearly 600 years ago) due to the harsh winters and exclusion, grew to be a prominent fishing and farming industry, now slowly fading away with the tide.

If you have the chance, definitely dedicate a day to just exploring the coastal towns of the Noto.

Before I arrived to Japan, I always had a short cut/faux-bob. The last cut was a pixie cut. Since coming here, my hair has grown over 3 inches uneven and a mess. I always would go to the hair stylist back at home to maintain my short cuts and get my occasional keratin treatments. But since coming to Japan, I haven’t been to a hairstylist in almost 10 months.

It’s not that I’m afraid of Japanese hair salons. I don’t have to worry about them thinning my hair or using too strong of a product on my hair. My hair type is very close to their hair type. The language barrier isn’t a problem either.

It’s the cost.

Going to the hair salon is expensive.

You also have to book your appointment and consultation well in advance. Where as in at the salons back home, you can walk in, see the stylists at work and get a consultation before booking. I don’t want to spend almost $200 on a haircut without knowing how the stylist works.

So, today, I’ve started cutting my own hair.

I made a mistake or two but I think that with practice I’ll get the hang of this hair cutting business.

I may visit the stylist for a kertain treatment but I think I’ll save a shit ton more money just cutting my own hair.

And it’s true. The customer service you get in this country is great — sometimes to insane levels.

Today I had an adventure in customer service at the most insane level.

I went to catch a movie and do some shopping. I’ve been meaning to see ‘Daijyoubu, 3kumi’ for the longest. It’s a movie about a disabled teacher who teaches a 5th grade class and through that year of being their teacher, the kids manage to grow from wild brats to respectable children who look past the differences in us and appreciate the good. It was a tear-jerker for me as I highly related with a lot of the themes in the story.

But this is not a review so lets get back to the original topic.

The movie was delayed. It was supposed to start at 5:40 but ended up being delayed 20 minutes due to a mishap in the projection room. The shift manager was a frantic mess. There was only me and two old ladies but this manager went to each of us personally and apologized for the delay. Then she ran away to get us free movie tickets and again, while bowing, apologized for the inconvenience. Then she went to the center of the theater, at the screen, apologized and said the movie will begin shortly and bowed for a really long time before running off to see if the problem was resolved.

I felt awkward.

I mean, it was a simple mishap. Not a big deal but she just kept apologizing and like throwing herself under the bus and I was like, feeling bad… she really didn’t need to keep bowing and apologizing.

After the movie finished, she was there waiting and again apologizing while bowing.

I know it’s a cultural thing to pretty much throw yourself under the bus for fuck ups but I just felt bad that she had to reduce herself over such a simple mistake that probably was beyond their control.

So, I got a free movie out of the delay and a really apologetic, bordering on tears, shift manager bowing to me for the mishap every moment she could.

Insane.

At the mall, ABC Mart (the Japanese version of Foot Locker), I found some converses on sale. I love converses. Back at home, I have over 7 pairs in different colors. Japan is insane with the amount of styles the chucks come in. The original oxfords were on sale for 3990 and before I could grab the box for my self, an employee rushes to my side, asks me if I need any help. I was a little thrown off by how prompt he was and told him I wanted the maroon in my huge ass foot size. So he grabs the box, then gets the shoe ready for me so I can try it on. Lacing it up and everything.

I just wanted to buy it but w/e I just went along.

So I try it on. It fits (as usual) and he starts up conversation after I apologize for having huge boat feet in Japan. He’s like, ah don’t worry my older sister has the same shoe size as you. There’s a lot of women with your foot size and I’m like its still like embarrassing but he was all like kinishinai deee and stuff. Anyway, I had my point card and he saw that I shopped at the Shinjuku store.

He was so excited that we had a convo about the Shinjuku store. He also recommended that I visit the East Shinjuku store next time I’m in Tokyo.

Nice bro.

As a foreigner in the inaka, customer service can be hit or miss. Sometimes it’s crap because the employee can’t get over the shock there’s a foreigner in front of them and Japanese came from their lips. On the other hand, it can be really top notch and well beyond the call of duty cause you’re foreign.

And once you become a regular they will never forget what you like and how you like it. For instance, every other Friday, I go to McDonalds to take advantage of the 390 value meal for a quick lunch and the window girl always has my two packets of ketchup ready for me. It’s insane how she remembers.

Now, the bad thing about customer service is that they follow the rule book to the T. In America, you can argue your way through anything and usually get what you want but in Japan, the rules are the rules. Sometimes the customer is not always right.

Customer service in Japan is insane; it doesn’t matter where you shop at, the level of humility can down right be scary. Though, sometimes it feels nice to be treated like a queen.

a latte from starbucks i got a few months back.

1. Omiyage?! What should I bring?!

It’s a little too early to be worrying about Omiyage. Why? Because you don’t know where you’re going. You don’t know your schools, your coworkers, or the overall feel of your BoE. Wait until you are placed and bombard your pred with those questions. Your pred would know better than anyone else on if omiyage worked or not.

In my situation, I brought Florida wine and natural honey fresh from a honey farm. Florida is primarily known for agriculture as one of it’s main industries, so I decided to get that. Someone told me to bring something that represents your home as omiyage and liquor was the preferred choice.

I never gave those gifts out. I have a bag full of honey and two bottles of wine collecting dust.

2. Luggage?! I read in my GOH XX?!?!

Okay, so this is how luggage works. The amount of luggage you can bring depends on your airline. For most American carriers you are only allowed two pieces of luggage, which should be free, and anything more is an additional charge. Not to mention it is not guaranteed it will get on the plane due to the 2 luggage per passenger rule (according to Delta, which was my airline). I had two luggages and a roller from my days as FA as a carry-on. That carry on ended up costing me $150 to check in because of the rent-a-cops working TSA kept saying it was a two piece luggage piece (it was not).

Anyway, once you arrive in Japan, you are going to be guided by JET volunteers through the airport once you leave customs. You will be taken to a bus loading area where your luggage will then be tagged to be shipped off to your prefecture. You are allowed one large bag and a personal item.

Why? Because space (JETs who fly are restricted on the amount of luggage they can bring on a flight and if you’re coming to Ishikawa, you are flying) and, well, its going to be really damn annoying tugging around 3 – 4 pieces of luggage around Tokyo. You also really won’t have time to splurge and do a shopping spree unless you plan on staying up for 72 hours straight.

It cost me $30 to ship my two large pieces of luggage to my prefecture. If you have more to ship, do it. You pretty much want to be as weight free as possible.

3. Work clothes?!

This is ESID. For me, I’m primarily an Elementary school teacher so I can get away with jeans and a nice shirt. On Fridays, I dress down in the summer with a t-shirt. I also wear skirts with leggings and turtle neck sweaters. Layering is a big thing with Japanese fashion, so wearing more than less is most ideal. 

The guaranteed outfit that all ALTs must have is a suit. You need a suit for entrance ceremonies, return from vacation ceremonies, the ceremony before the ceremony, and the ceremony before the ceremony before that other ceremony. Have a nice suit for ceremonies. Oh, and PTA/Open Class days.

Basically, as long as you’re not flopping around with your boobs hanging out and your skirt isn’t short to the point that you’re showing your crotch the world, you should be good. But, again, ESID. High Schools probably have a higher dress code policy for their teachers than Elementary and Middle School. Ask your pred and get their opinion.

4. What should I bring then for clothes?!

If you have a waist less than 88cm, hips less than 100cm, and are no taller than 5’5”…. Finding clothes in Japan is not a problem. If you are bigger than that, good luck. American sizes run larger, sometimes double, than Japanese sizes. A size 10 in America is a size 14 in Japan. A medium in America is a Large in Japan. If you are a woman, any shoe size larger than an 8 means shoes do not exist for you unless you mind wearing men’s shoes. The only places in Japan to find “plus size” (大きいサイズ) clothing is in cities with a huge foriegn population, such as Osaka or Tokyo.

Uniqlo’s Ginza flagship store is the only Uniqlo store in all of Japan that carries sizes larger than XL.

You can shop online for plus size clothing but if you are very curvy or tall, it’s best to try them out as they may run short or simply make your curves look like you’re wearing a fat suit. You could probably find clothes at local boutiques and smaller chains that cater to ‘plus size’ (American) body types, so it’s really just discovering on your own.

tl;dr: Bring your own clothes and worry about shopping for Japanese clothes later.

5. SHOES

Yes, you need two pairs of shoes. One for indoors and a pair for outdoors. I’ve heard of ALTs who just use the school’s slippers. I don’t, I travel with a pair cause I got huge feet. Do whatever you want here, its not a big deal.

That’s all the questions I’ve been getting so far and seeing around the web, so if you have anymore feel free to ask and I’ll just add them to this post. Good luck.

Today was the first day of school across Japan, for some it was entrance ceremonies and for others it was school tours and club presentations for the first years. At my school, we had the entrance ceremony last Friday and dedicated the first day of school to getting the kids all adjusted into middle school life. It was adorable to watch since I knew about 90% of the entire first year class seeing how I taught them English as six graders. So whenever they spotted me in the shadows, they would wave or yell my name in excitement.

Some of my first years were nervous as hell. Understandable considering they came from schools where their entire class size was no more than 8 kids and now they’re in a class with 35 kids. I have a feeling though that what has came through these doors will not be the same child once they leave. It’s now witnessing that change from innocent childhood to teenagers with attitudes.

Anyway, half the staff changed this year and we have new staffers now. Some are really nice while others are, well, can’t really gauge what they are like. Of course, being resident foreigner in the teacher’s room people just assume I don’t speak or understand Japanese. I’ve gotten used to the invisible barrier but I will admit, it did piss me off. I’m just glad they moved me from the math teacher because, christ, it was like I did not exist in his world. History teacher would say good morning and math teacher would just stare off into the distance.

This whole start of the new year was pretty humbling and warm. Probably due to the fact that the area is so small and I knew all the kids coming in. I have high hopes and I really wish that they continue with an interest in English. I tried my best to make the classes fun for them while they were 6th graders, I hope that they don’t loose that interest going into middle school.

For a change of topic, high school English must now be taught completely in English. I am really wondering how this is going to be approached from the middle school level. The Japanese educational system has been hard pressed that this country has constantly been ranked the lowest among Asian nations when it comes to English proficiency despite the fact that the language is taught from the 5th grade onwards through university. But, I don’t know if these changes are going to make it any better… I think the actual course material needs to be changed. The English learned is not ‘real’ English, but textbook English designed to pass exams. These kids maybe able to say, ‘ Hello! I’m XX. I’m XX years old. Do you like sushi? I like sushi very much. I study very hard. Thank you! ‘ but that isn’t going to carry a conversation, let alone save them in an English speaking country.

If Japan wants to tackle this English problem, the English language needs to be introduced more indepth at the Elementary level. Dedicate the 3rd and 4th years to pronunciation  jump into grammar at the 5th and 6th grades, and continue on to composition and reading through middle school and beyond. Japan has the right idea but they’re going about it all wrong and as a product of this system, it grates me to teach this jumbled Japanglish.

I finally remembered what ceremonies in Japanese schools felt like, or at least at the middle school level — JROTC. When I was in High School, I spent 4 years in NJROTC. It’s a military program offered in High Schools across America for those interested in eventually joining the service. I had considered enlisting but then realized that was a stupid decision and only stuck in for the cool lunch perks, ability to wear a cool uniform every Wednesday, and shoot rifles in the school yard.

Every time there was a ceremony, either to congratulate a cadet on winning a competition or a rank promotion, it had that strict military precision.

Attention on Deck!
Parade Rest.

(insert awards here)

Attention.
Fall out. 
Aye, aye, sir/m’am. 

In the Japanese schools it’s more like this,

Stand!
Bow!
Return to seats

(insert awards here)

Stand!
Bow!
Return to seats, dismiss each class.

Even the way they accept their awards has that military precision. Accept the award with both hands, raise it, take a step back, hold it down, then do an about face, bow, turn left, bow, about face, bow, turn right, bow, then leave the stage. Everything follows a detached order which is a stark 180 difference in how educational ceremonies are held in America. Not to say there’s no order, there obviously is, but the system is just different.The ceremony is different.

And that’s where cultures clash.

Anyway, half the students left home shortly after scarfing down their bentos. Those were the kids that opted out of joining clubs. The rest of the school, the 45 odd kids,  are outside practicing in their clubs. Schools officially over for the year but there’s still clubs to attend. It’s not much different than High School (sports teams practice all year round, marching band has a summer camp for routine training) but it’s really interesting to see on a Middle School level. I was in clubs in Jr. high but they stopped the moment the final bell of the year rang.

I also found out that teachers do not take vacation either. Unlike in America, even during a vacation, the teachers have to report back to school to plan (and maybe waste time). Teaching is seriously a 365 day job in this country.

The school year is finally over and Spring Break has begun. I wonder where I’ll trottle off to……

WINTER’S OVER. AW YEAH.